​Preparing for the New Year Without Setting Yourself up for Failure

 
Ahhhh, the New Year is almost here!  Ahhh!  Is this how the upcoming New Year feels to you?  If so, you are not alone, but lets see if we can improve the ahhhh to maybe a woo hoo!  
 
Some people use the New Year to try to shove all of their goals into the first week or month.  They make resolutions, promise themselves various things, and plan for immediate success.  Unfortunately, this often leaves people let down and feeling even worse then when they started.  Also, right before the New Year is when people often seem to realize they didn’t complete all of their goals that they did set out to do the previous New Year, thus keeping them from feeling the joy and possibilities of the New Year. 
 
However, we do not have to feel this way!!  Below are some thoughts for the end of the year and some tips to start 2016 right and in a positive mindset.
 
The end of 2015 reflections:
 
-Instead of looking at what you didn’t accomplish, look at what you did.  No matter how small or how tough of a year you had, you accomplished something positive.  Find it and try not to let the goals you didn’t accomplish ruin the beautiful positive things you did.
 
-Remember you are human and humans sometimes do not accomplish their goals, but this isn’t a bad thing!  We all do it.  Such is life and even if we try to be perfect in the end we are human and being human is beautiful.
 
-If the goals you set in 2015 are still important be prepared to try again with the same hopefulness you had the first time.
 
Some tips for 2016:
I am generally against New Year resolutions, but making reasonable goals I believe can set up a fresh New Year nicely.
 
-Make small incremental goals.  For example, if your goal is to lose 50 pounds make small goals to get there, i.e. 5-10 pounds by April, so on and so forth.  Larger goals can feel daunting and can set you up for failure.
 
-Be kind to yourself.  If you fall off track remember what an amazing human you are, forgive yourself, and jump back on.  You only truly fail if you stop trying.
 
-Take care of your health.  If your physical and mental health are good you will be able to accomplish other goals more successfully.  If your goal is to improve your health, then that is amazing as well!  The rest of your life will improve with it!
 
-Get a buddy.  If your goal lends itself to a buddy see if you can enlist someone to work towards it with you.  We all have bad days and when we have a buddy we are more willing to get through them.
 
-Finally, remember that if next year at this time you haven’t met your goals it is okay, 2017 will be waiting for you to try again.  Sometimes things take longer than expected and all we can do is keep chugging along. 
 
Good luck this New Year with any of your goals and if you choose not to set any that is fine too!  May 2016 bring you much luck, love, and happiness!
​-Carmen Wolf, LMFT

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